Journal of the Motherhood Initiative for Research and Community Involvement (JMI - York University)

Mogadime, Dolana

English

South African Canadian Women Reclaiming Revolutionary Storytelling Through Grandmother's Warrior Eyes

Dunlop, Rishma

Editor's Notes 
Proleptic Time and the Lives of Grandmothers 
Centered on the world's stage, 
she sings to  her loves and beloveds, 
t o  her foes and detractors: 
However I am perceived and deceived, 
however my ignorance and conceits, 
lay aside yourfears that I will be undone, 
for Ishall not be moved. 
-Maya Angelou, "Our Grandmothers" 
In this special themed issue on Grandmothers, our writers in Folio speak of a 
fascinating range of experiences, ofgenerational and cultural differences voiced 
in innovative forms. 
Poems by yaya Yao are beautifully crafted and sensory. In her poems, 
"thanks" and "turned," the narrator explores immigrant experience through the 
lenses of a granddaughter's desires juxtaposed against a grandmother's dreams. 
Trela Anderson writes a moving personal essay titled "Sugar Bread 
Dreams," an account of her personal relationship with the Langston Hughes 
poem "Harlem." Anderson's narrative moves into memory, evoking the image 
of sugar bread in Hughes' poem as a continuous thread in a story about her 
grandmother and adopted grandson. 
Robbie Kahn writes her "Aziz Journal" from the narrative perspective of 
a grandmother. "Aziz Journal" is a deeply contemplative and evocative work, 
one that emanates an intense physicality in the writing, a sensory awareness of 
the body and the world that is keenly felt. Kahn brings us close to the experience 
Journal of the Associationfor Research on Mothering 1 143 
ofgrowing to know a grandchild through the sensual details of memory, touch, 
love and trust. 
In  "Re-constructing Romania" Karen Krasny has created a "Readers' 
Theatre in Five Voices," a unique dramatic form for exploring the theme of 
foreign adoption. This is an autobiographical account of Krasny's own experi- 
ences of becoming an adoptive mother of two Romanian born boys and 
bringing them back to Canada. The story took on deep historical and personal 
significance when Krasny found herself in a region close to her ppternal 
grandmother's birthplace and in proximity to her mother-in-law's former 
home in Ukraine prior to her internment in a Nazi work camp. 
Renee Norman's beautiful poem "Fresh Sheets" also evokes memory and 
loss, the strong sense of a grandmother who is somehow still with her 
granddaughter, somewhere in the continued rituals of changing sheets, not 
only in remembrance of a grandmother's death, but in the present, the act of 
making up a bed with fresh sheets becoming a gift of the living: "laid with fresh 
ripe raspberrieslthe smell of mustard basted onto brisket." 
Laurie h k w r i t e s  a poetic contemplation set in Canada of the history of 
a grandmother, Baba, originally from the former Soviet Union. The rhythms 
of Baba's speech are caught brilliantly in this work titled "Time Coming." 
Baba's aging and dying in a nursing home coincides with a granddaughter 
giving birth. The mother becomes "the timekeeper," andwhat remains breathes 
"in the beatslof mother time." 
Karen Krasny writes in her introduction of "the sense that the past 
impinges on the present in ways that ground future possibilities." This 
perspective of proleptic time is evident in the works of the writers in this issue 
of Folio. The writings form a historiographic poeisis through ancestral time in 
the re-imaginings and reconstructions of the histories of grandmothers, 
histories of trauma, hardship, joy, sorrow, mourning, loss, hope, infinite 
possibility. 
-Rishma Dunlop 


Editor's Notes

Bouvard, Marguerite Guzman

Reflections on Being a Grandmother

Raby, Rebecca

Teenage Girls and their Grandmothers: Building Connections Across Difference

Ripley, M. Louise

Book Reviews 
The Raging Grannies: Wild Hats, Cheeky Songs 
and Witty Actions for a Better World 
Carole Roy 
Montreal: Black Rose Books, 2004 
Reviewed by M. Louise Ripley 
As a crone, and the daughter of alively, ninety-year-old crone, I approached the 
task of reviewing The Raging Grannies with particular relish, and anticipated 
the need to announce my bias in favour of Carole Roy's book. But there is no 
need for caution or apology. The Raging Grannies is a great book! 
Roy begins with a history of the Raging Grannies, a group ofwomen that 
originated in Victoria, British Columbia in 1987. "Dressed as old-fashioned 
conservative proper little old ladies," presented an Un-Valentine on Valentine's 
Day to the then local Member of Parliament, Chair of the Defence Committee 
hearing briefs on the issue of uranium mining. The women brought a laundry 
basketful of their own briefs-a clothesline full of women's underwear, in 
fact-into the British Columbia Legislature building to register their protest 
against the Chair's "lack of action and commitment on nuclear issues." They 
thought it would be a one-time protest, but something about the Grannies 
caught on in the minds ofthose who care about the environment and the future 
of the human race. The idea of dressing up in silly clothes, crazy hats, and 
parodying the stereotype of grandmothers (the Raging Grannies later staged a 
knit-in for peace) to convey a point proved enormously appealing to numbers 
180 1 Volume 7, Number 2 
ofwomen. The successful ploy enabled the Grannies to be heard-when less 
theatrical protests would have been squelched and when anyone but a grand- 
mother might have been ill-treated. Needless to say, humour is an important 
tool in the Grannies' tool-kit, and they profit fiom the unwillingness of police, 
soldiers, or politicians to be seen harming "old women." 
Roy follows the history of the Grannies as they grew into a Canadian 
institution of protest, with "branches" located across Canada, the United 
States, Greece, and Australia. The Grannies are not easily described. In fact, 
they range in age from the nineties and to younger gannies-at-heart who are 
in their twenties and thirties. "A Granny isn't a grandmother; a Granny is a 
frame of mind. Attitude!" says Granny Betsy Carr of Toronto. The Grannies 
are, in Roy's own words, "cultural activists who use humour to highlight issues 
rather than to deny, dismiss, or pacify situations." They use surprise and their 
own willingness to "make fools of themselves" to achieve awareness and 
empowerment. 
The story of the Grannies, told in nine chapters, is interspersed with one- 
page biographies of many of the women interviewed for the book, dozens of 
quotes directly from the Grannies themselves, new Raging Granny words to 
familiar tunes, and numerous pictures. The Grannies protest against a variety 
of issues, including nuclearweapons, war, government cuts in welfare, spraying 
of poisons, genetic engineering, sweatshops, the closure of bank branches and 
libraries, and arming outer space. They also speak out in favour ofmany causes: 
peace, care for the environment, AIDS, strikes for better working conditions, 
drag queens, affordable housing, gay rights, health care, better treatment ofthe 
homeless, power and visibility for older women, and giving "credence to 
protests of the young." I shared the shock that many ofthe Grannies expressed 
when they learned what kinds of issues truly frighten those in power. As one 
Granny put it, "when I realized that it's the very things that we stand for that 
seem to threaten people in authority so deeply, it was a shock, really it was a 
shock." 
My favourite chapter, "Raging Grannies in the Wide Web of Life," brings 
together the various themes of the book, and its title is reminiscent of the 
seventh principle of the Unitarian Universdist denomination, ofwhich several 
Grannies are members. It was especially delightful to discover that I personally 
knew more than one individual Granny, including one who is pictured in Roy's 
book. 
Based on an academic thesis, Roy's book does a commendable job of 
including illustrative and clarifying references to other scholarly work in the 
field, in particular the work of Shelagh Wilkinson. At the same time, it is a 
highly readable text. The underlying thread of so many of the Grannies' 
stories--of finding their voices when dressing up in funny clothes and hats- 
is reminiscent of a major thrust of a recent thesis on crones by Gail McCabe: 
that after menopause, when they are no longer "worth" categorizing by men as 
either future wives or potential bearers of children, many women find them- 
Journal ofthe Association for Research on Mothering / 181 
Book Reviews 
selves rediscovering the freedom of movement, thought, and action they knew 
as young girls. Roy's wonderful, warm, witty, outrageous, committed, caring 
Grannies show evidence of this same freedom. 
If I can offer one criticism of this book it is that there is frequent repeti- 
tion of themes across chapters. Repeatedly, readers learn about the World 
Trade Organization protests and the importance of "attitude," for example. 
But this fault does not detract from the sheer enjoyment of reading the book 
and getting to know the Grannies who inspire readers to get up from their 
armchairs and do something to save the world. As Carole Roy states near the 
close of The Raging Grannies: "To look at older women activists is an opportu- 
nity to contribute to scholarship on women's organizing and social movements 
as well as offer recognition and learn from a group ofwomen who have actively 
and publicly engaged with the issues oftheir time." In this, The Raging Grannies 
succeeds admirably. 
Intentional Grandparenting: 
A Boomer's Guide 
Peggy Edwards and Mary Jane Sterne 
Toronto: McClelland and Stewart, 2005 
Reviewed by Susan Swanson 
Being a grandparent is one of the most fulfilling stages in the life course. 
However, as Peggy Edwards and Mary Jane Sterne point out in this informative 
and entertaining book, grandparenting may be more complex in the twenty- 
first century than it was for previous generations. There have been many 
changes in marriage and parenting trends, including later age at marriage, 
increases in cohabitation, same sex unions, interracial and bicultural marriages, 
as well as divorce. Families are often mobile and live far distances apart. An 
ageing population means that grandparents are living longer and are often 
members ofthe "sandwich" or "club sandwich" generation, i.e. people who have 
frail older parents, adult children, and grandchildren - all with different needs 
and expectations. 
Based on solid evidence from experts, combinedwith insightful and often 
poignant anecdotes fromgrandparents, parents, andgrandchildren, Intentional 
Grandparenting provides readers with ten child-centred principles for effective 
grandparenting. A t  the heart of the book is the concept of being intentional- 
planning ahead and taking deliberate action to be the kind of grandparent one 
wants to be. Ten principles cover modernchallenges suchas step-grandparenting, 
distance grandparenting, and accepting and respecting one's adult children in 
182 1 Volume 7, Number 2 


The Raging Grannies: Wild Hats, Cheeky Songs and Witty Actions for a Better World

Villanueva, Karen

Mother Love in Buddhism

Athan, Aurélie

Miller, Lisa

Spiritual Awakening Through the Motherhood Journey

Brenegan, Debra

Book Reviews 
Mother Shock: 
Loving Every (Other) Minute of It 
Andrea J. Buchanan 
New York Seal Press, 2003 
Reviewed by Debra Brenegan 
According to Andrea Buchanan's, Mother Shock: Loving Every (Other) Minute 
et, mothers align themselves with the "conventional assumption that moth- 
erhood is noble and joyous and uncomplicated." Using the extended metaphor 
that the transition into an often messy "real motherhood" is like "culture shock," 
Andrea Buchanan's book may help reassure new mothers who are experiencing 
ambivalent feelings of motherhood, but it will do little to explain the reasons 
for these feelings. 
Buchanan spends approximately one-third of her book defending her 
premise that mothers are afraid, unwilling, or unable to talk about the less- 
than-great aspects of mothering. She cites instances when women friends claim 
to "love every minuten of their parenting responsibilities, leaving a sleep- 
deprived and sometimes stressed Buchanan bewildered. Buchanan had to 
stumble upon online mothering support communities and establish her own 
neighborhood playgroup before she finally met a few women who would dare 
to express anything but pure bliss about their mothering duties. She writes, "It's 
harder than you think to admit your even occasional dissatisfaction as a mother 
without feeling instant guilt, an immediate sensation of shame for even 
suggesting you might not be happy." 
Buchanan's assumption that the majority of mothers purposely present 
facades of "contented womanhood" is problematic, however. Granted, media 
representations and "how-to" books often give the impression that mothers' 
loving instincts lead them along a smooth path of natural, spontaneous 
caregiving, but are not female support systems founded on actual experience 
rather than media images? It is surprising that Buchanan finds the opposite to 
be true. 
Buchanan goes on to admit that she "slowly learned that feeling conflicted 
does not mean that I don't love my child." Her statement gives readers 
permission to set aside ambivalent feelings of self-worth and allows them to 
confront other issues common to new motherhood. Buchanan's book includes 
chapters on confronting advice-wielding friends and relatives, deciding when 
or if to have another baby, and establishing nurturing support systems, but her 
true gems of wisdom pop up seemingly unplanned amid her diary-like essays. 
For instance, she touches on the idea that once people find out she is a mother-- 
and a mother who works from home-she "becomes less appealing, more easily 
dismissed." Moreover, in the middle of a heartfelt letter to her future daughter 
confessing love and sometimes frustration, Buchanan suddenly adds, "I wish 
Journal ofthe Association for Research on Mothering 1 205 
Book Reviews 
there was a better division oflabor than Daddy when he has time and Mommy 
all day, all night." Unfortunately, Buchanan quickly drops such pertinent 
subjects in favour ofless interesting topics, such the guilt associatedwith bottle- 
feeding or a mother's embarrassment when her toddler utters an expletive. 
Buchanan's assumption that her audience is driven by media images of 
motherhood smacks of condescension. She should release mothers from false 
assumptions and offer them more ofher occasional nuggets ofmodern wisdom. 
For instance, she does not link her own satisfaction derived from a rare 
afternoon devoted to work to a human being's need to contribute to the world 
by performing valuable work. Although mothering is valuable, society consid- 
ers it economically valueless. Instead of confronting the underlying issue ofthe 
worth of women's work both as mothers and employees, Buchanan concludes 
disappointingly that she is "an idiot" for forgetting that, "for now at least, those 
two things are mutually exclusive." Readers are left to wonder about Buchanan's 
purpose in writing her book. 
Still, Buchanan's style is warm and readers cannot help but be engaged by 
such statements as, "Now, if you moms of teenagers could kindly stop laughing 
at me." Although she concludes that "as a mother I am also constantly 
addressing the question of balance, trying to weigh my own wants and needs 
against my daughter's, trying to balance my interests with hers," her book 
clearly lacks balance. Buchanan concentrates on the mundane choices associ- 
ated with motherhood and society's judgment of those choices. She does not 
show how contemporary mothers balance their needs, feelings, and desires with 
those of other people--including their children. 
Twice Alive: 
A Spiritual Guide to Mothering Through 
Pregnancy and the Child's First Year 
Beth Osnes 
Boulder, CO: Woven Word Press, 2005 
Reviewed by Juliana Forbes 
I must begin by declaring that I am not an unbiased reviewer of Beth Osnes's 
Twice Alive: A Spiritual Guide to Mothering Through Pregnancy and the Child's 
First Year. My children's births and lives are woven inextricably throughout its 
words since I am a near and dear friend of the author. In fact, she and I, with 
two other mother friends, founded Mothers Acting Up, a movement to 
mobilize the vast political strength of mothers to protect the world's children. 
I have been privileged to read Osnes's workin gestation, was a support through 
206 1 Volume 7, Number l 


Mother Shock: Loving Every (Other) Minute of It

Contributor Notes

Norman, Renee

Renee Norman 
Fresh Sheets 
there's the odd sense 
she's stii there 
bent over a brisket in an oven 
whiie i 
a chiid visiting in the summer 
ran screaming from the bees 
that swarmed her raspberries 
and years later i still can hear 
her voice ask about my children 
in our house miles away 
a Holly Hobby pillowcase 
a wine-colored robe 
a toy chalkboard 
the legacies of her attention 
in the hospital she asked 
for fresh sheets on her apartment beds 
the last words of someone dying 
i change the sheets on those beds 
every summer when i go home 
laid with fresh ripe raspberries 
the smell of mustard basted onto brisket 
Journal oftbe Association for Research on Mothering / 177 


Fresh Sheets